ACCORDING TO ESQUIRE: HALLE BERRY IS THE SEXIEST WOMAN ALIVE

ESQUIRE magazine has HALLE BERRY gracing the cover of its upcoming issue. According to them, HALLE is the sexiest woman alive.

Since I’m a straight girl, my opinion really means SFA.

For one thing, this sexiest woman alive bit is a whole lot of nonsense. What they really mean is: the most provocative woman currently in the public eye.

Who’s to say that there isn’t a woman out there that isn’t widely known that couldn’t give those girls a damn good run for their money…?

*raises eyebrow*

Not only that, beauty and sensuality are endlessly subjective. Is HALLE BERRY sexy? DEFINITELY. I think she’s hot as hell. If you had to make a choice out of everyone out there, you can’t really argue with her as a selection.

But the sexiest woman alive? Not in my book.

I’d put KIM BASINGER, LENA OLIN and SOPHIA LOREN all ahead of her. But I have to admit I haven’t seen any of them for a while. ANGELINA JOLIE, CATHERINE ZETA JONES and SCARLETT JOHANSSON are, in my opinion, all sexier than HALLE.

Not that there’s a thing wrong with HALLE. She’s awesome. But she wouldn’t be my #1 pick.

That’s just me. Any thoughts or comments from the fabulous readership?

Take your shot….

8 Responses to “ACCORDING TO ESQUIRE: HALLE BERRY IS THE SEXIEST WOMAN ALIVE”

  1. i’m just glad the eyebrow raising has returned !!! 🙂

    now let’s go with your sexier list and let’s geekize it. 😉

    ok i went to http://www.facade.com now go to biorhythms

    well surprise that how it did with the females m listed. and you think this is geared to give you mostly good results, i assure you.

    let’s see how i do with cp have kidman…drumroll please…

    yep that’s 2% in the Physical dept. (hey i got a few 0% in that category too. *awesome*) sub mediocre in the emotional but pretty good in the Intellectual dept. i get celeb ‘matches’ that worked out that way.

    and some that were horrible across the board.

    and they were a few celebs i didn’t need to know/expect i’d supposedly match up so well with…like this…

    yes i’m admitting this/linking this in public. now you know my geek cred is truly off the scale. because how many guiys would admit this ???

    ha ha…

    so it went celebs i wasn’t even slightly fans of …i supposedly would mesh well with… (see ashlee numbers and…i got some very good numbers with beyonce. really..)

    celebs i wasn’t fans of that i hope i’d mesh a bit with (hey i want to be cool) and got mostly mediocre/laughable /results…see kidman score for details…

    ok i know not to take this seriously. hell i don’t even know what it means. but it entertained your sexless wimp the same way a summer blockbuster/entertains/you. how can i refuse ??? *ha ha*

    i think ashlee and I would be perfect together because we’re both poseurs. 😉

    and ashlee did inspire segments like this in her reviews (in a review of her second cd ‘all of me’

    Gone are the bright, happy colors and cute Ashlee depicted on the cover of Autobiography. In its place is a dark, shadowy black-and-white portrait of the singer on the cover, topped off by thick, gothic lettering. All of which makes Ashlee Simpson the first person in history to go goth by going blonde.

    and i hit those segments of puzzlement all the time in netland.

    we’re perfect togther !!! 😉

  2. i think how whomever feels about whatever celeb’s acting or what they feel they represent (or represent to them) or what they like of their persona anything really..

    is what puts someone over on ‘the hot’ list. if whatever other factors aren’t gonna count. this way you’ll have guys saying they see females hotter than whatever celebs on the street. all the time.

    i do wonder where these guys live. where they see females that look like the ‘hottest’ celebs/models on regular basis by just walking a block or so ??? *ha ha*

    the other net favorite is when whatever ‘hot’ female celeb get called just an average looking girl.

    where are these ‘average’ looking females ???

    oh well maybe if i lived on east/west coast i’d say the same. *just kidding*

  3. For whatever reason, my darling glim, this particular post ended up in spam. I have not the slightest clue why.

    You just go wild over that eyebrow raising, don’t you, baby? Now how the hell did I know that you were going to comment on that? I could see that one coming a mile away.

    No, two miles….

    I looked up your comparison charts and it said you had some VERY HIGH ratings with ANGELINA JOLIE and CZJ. Exceptionally high.

    So you can’t fool me. This ain’t my first time on the merry go round, honey.

    But you like Ashlee? She’s your kind of girl?

  4. glim, I think there are several things at play here. One is personal taste.

    If people don’t have specific types that turn their respective cranks, then everyone has a really good idea of what kind of people they usually find attractive. I think that individuals (both men and women) will cut certain celebrities A LOT of slack if they’re well within the ranges that are generally turn ons for them.

    Say, for example, that some guy likes petite voluptuous blondes. GENERALLY.

    Even though (for example) he may feel in his heart that there are other women out there that turn his crank more than SCARLETT JOHANSSON, he’ll still give her an enormous free pass because she fits the profile of what he’s usually attracted to. So she gets more points than say, CATHERINE ZETA JONES – who he may objectively think is actually slightly more attractive.

    The other thing is: Everyone has their own personal ideas about what’s beautiful and what’s sexy. There is no rhyme or reason TO ANY OF THAT.

    IT JUST IS.

    You think someone is unappealing, pleasant looking, drop dead gorgeous – or you’re completely indifferent to them. You can never figure out precisely why. It’s just that, for everybody, there are some people that sashay by and you can just feel the heat rise up from the back of your neck and that little bell go DING! DING! DING!!!

    You may be aware (or you should be, anyway – if you’re over the age of 12) that there are certain kinds of people that you’re drawn to. But you never know exactly why.

    What it boils down to is (and you and I have talked about this before): there are some individuals that Hollywood and the modelling industry puts up on pedestals and tries to sell as the next big thing. Some of the general public buys into that. Some not.

    I think that’s what they mean, glim. Someone doesn’t find that particular celeb that impressive. So they say she just strikes them as a normal ordinary woman (or average) and that they see hotter girls every day – at work, at the mall etc.

    If someone doesn’t do anything for you, then that’s the whole ball of wax. Right there.

    But I guess there isn’t ANYONE that appeals to EVERYBODY right across the board.

    The majority? For sure.

    Everyone? Probably not…

  5. hmm no i’m not a fan/admirer of ashlee. i just found this pretty funny.

    since i’m never gonna mesh with anyone on any sort of aesthetic level/ aesthetics. ( “maybe if there was another like me.” why not go totally the opposite ?? *ha ha*

    the joke being someone a bit more mainstreamy like a simpson type (yep that includes either) would just lump me as a weirdo/loser and have zero interest. espeicially zero interest in the first thing that’s listed those charts i link to (well at least none if i were involved) and yeah in the case of an ashlee/jessica s. i really wouldn’t care if i were on the zero list.

    and the bigger joke is i’m not expecting to mesh worth a darn with the supposed alternative/indie crowd/set either. this meshing was none when i was younger and the chances are even worse now i’m uh older.

    so yeah i often see the common/interest junk supposedly being important. or at least important/a cool/starting point. but since i can’t count on that (being an advantage for me) going totally the opposite and supposedly seeing i’d ‘mesh’ well with ashlee was pretty funny to me. *ha ha*

    and even better. 😉 there someone that the internet makes fun of as much/or more than ashlee and finds even less phyiscally appealing and i think my overall level with her was even higher than what i got with ashlee. *ha ha* so yeah i find it funny.

    ‘and you’ll surely laugh when you see this photograph’

    and ok this other female i thoght was pretty cool when i saw her on letterman.oh whenever in 90’s. but i bet she’s just a ‘normal’ female now.

    no one stays awkward forever. except me. *ha ha*

  6. m. you’re the voice of a few generations. brilliant. 🙂

    and one day i’m gonna have to tell you of a couple of my real pop crushes. lord this is gonna be embarrassing… 😉

  7. Oh, glim, glim, glim…

    Sweetie, you’re so intelligent, funny and such a lovely guy. You have no idea what you have to offer. But you never listen to me – and we’ve been over this before…

    Ashlee is actually kind of punky. She is slightly mainstream. But she’s quite a bit darker edged and out there in a non threatening way. I know it’s marketing and I’m sure there was a concerted effort to make sure that she and JESSICA weren’t going after the same niche in terms of popular music.

    But still….

  8. Thank you so much for all that, my adorable eloquent glim.

    Hey, you don’t have to tell me about your crushes in public if you feel uncomfortable. That’s up to you entirely. Shouldn’t be embarrassing, though. It’s OK. We all like whom we like and that’s just dandy.

    Well, I call them as I see them.

    There are cute women, pleasant looking women, good looking women, sexy women, drop dead gorgeous women, women with incredibly beautiful faces, women with distracting physiques, stylish women, elegant women or any possible combination of any of those.

    Then you have characteristics that will set individuals apart: intelligence, wit, charisma, star quality, decency, goodness etc.

    Finally, there’s talent. Specifically talent in your profession of choice.

    When you put some of these current nondescript personalities up against charismatic beauties that can really act (ELIZABETH TAYLOR, VIVIEN LEIGH, RITA HAYWORTH, AVA GARDNER, ANN MARGRET, HELEN MIRREN, KIM BASINGER, MERYL STREEP, JESSICA LANGE, NICOLE KIDMAN, CATHERINE ZETA JONES, JULIA ROBERTS, MICHELLE PFEIFFER) there is no comparison.

    NONE.

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